Mountain Porn And Folk Rock

 

“…Stretch out my life
And pick the seams out
Take what you like
But close my ears and eyes
Watch me stumble over and over…”

*Lover of the Light*

Mumford & Sons

 

Adventure

Things I Cannot Live Without: Music

I have vivid memories of a long gone era, when I was young and my parents were still married. When evenings were filled with music and dancing.

Some of the most special are of my father singing “Blueberry Hill” by Fats Domino or him crooning to “November Rain” by Guns and Roses. It was no surprise that most of these moments were when he was tipsy, sometimes not. He was a conservative man but through music he awakened. These were the times when he most displayed his affection, either with my mother, myself and my siblings and his extended family.

I remember going to a music festival with him when I was seventeen. Nevermind Oppi Koppi or Splashy Fen, I went to KKNK( the Klein Karoo Nationale Kunstefees – an arts festival in Oudtshoorn). Afternoons consisted of drinking cheap bottles of wine and listening to musicians, young, old, Afrikaans and English. I had to live in a tent for a week nd had to deal with my father trying to bum cigarettes off me as he had recently found out that I was a smoker. He had quit for two years, but that didnt deter him from asking. Being the good daughter I refused him a ciggy everytime.

Although I thought the trip might be boring…afterall I was 17 and a typical rebellious party animal daughter…I took the portunity to spend the little time I could with my dad as my parents were divorced and we didnt spend a lot of quality time with him back then.

Well, it is one I will never forget. Instead of watching me like a hawk he let me do pretty much what I wanted to. If I didnt want to spend tme with him I could walk through the small town of Oudtshoorn dropping in on little art shows and comedians, looking through flea markets and meeting some interesting people.

I remember sunshine and music. Blackie Swart singing “Luwe Lulu” and heaing some David Kramer and Koos Kombuis. I could barely speak Afrikaans back then, hell I stil do a shitty job of it, but it wasnt so much undersanding what they were singing about because it was about feeling.

And music is about feeling.

Music is about laughing and crying, about lifting the spirits or sometimes fueling your anger. The strumming of a guitar and the beat of a drum. A voice singing a tune, someone singing along, the clapping of hands and the movement of feet to tunes.

I remember my darkest moments, lying alone in my bed, the tears streaming like a flood; to the sounds of Pink, or Guns and Roses, or Matchbox 20 or Sara Barielles or Live. Has your heart ever been in so much anguish that you cannot breathe, your chest is caving in and in those moments you are so completely overcome with grief you feel you will die?

Have you ever been at a concert and they play your favourite song. Thousands of people dancing and singing to the same lyrics. Almost as if you are in trance. A feeling of complete elation and bliss that cannot be substitute?

It is true that I love the mountains, but second to the mountains is music. I cannot go long in this “Babylon” without it.

Benjamin Franklin Said It

“Those who give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety”

Mafadi…Here I Come

Fuck A Duck.

The last few evenings have been restless to say the least. Sunday evening I managed an entire 2 hours of sleep if I was lucky, and yesterday evening I managed perhaps five yesterday evening.

A pattern is emerging. Sleepless nights before and during a trip have plagued me since the beginning of my hiking lifestyle. Well I cannot afford to go without rest for the five day, four night trip to the highest peak in South Arica.

I leave for the trip tomorrow morning and I fear I will not get enough sleep, so I am seriously considering a little help in the form of a sleeping tablet.

Yes, I have always been averse to the use of any type of medication, especially sleeping pills, but I almost feel as if I do not have a choice. Sleep deprivation, as fun as it may be at the time(if you call tossing and turning in your bed unable to shut down the endless feedback in your mind fun), really does suck and in the end affects concentration, decision making, performance and reflexes.

Why am I battling to sleep? Well I guess it has to do with nerves…a mixture of excitement and apprehension.

Also, a look at the upcoming weather forecast has me slightly rattled. Temperatures are dropping as a cold front is hitting the Berg this weekend and this will be the coldest weather I have been subject to in my life so far. It is also the longest trip (only a day but that’s 24 hours, and that is a lot).

Shit Happens.

I signed up for this. I enjoy hiking, the mountains and sleeping in tents on the ground, and making number 2′s in the bush and freezing my butt off in the middle of nowhere foregoing television and a bed and a heater. And sometimes, like this moment, I ask myself:

And then Frosty pipes up in the back of my head:

“Let’s see if you’re worth your salt.”

I have to face the challenge. I have to work at it. I have to prove myself. I have to sacrifice for what I love. In some messed up way I realize that I did not only choose the mountains but the mountains chose me. Every day up there is another gift that unwraps itself.

Scared?
Hell Yes!

But I am up for it?
Hell Yes!

As the Mountain Man says: “It’s a rite of Passage”.
But why oh why can’t we just cheat and buy the certificate online?

Before I depart on this trip I leave you with this quote from the film Legends of the Fall and I realize that I am quite happy with either end:

“Some people hear their own inner voices with great clearness and they live by what they hear. Such people become crazy, or they become legends.”

Vince Lombardi Said It

“Gentlemen, we are going to relentlessly chase perfection, knowing full well we will not catch it, because nothing is perfect. But we are going to relentlessly chase it, because in the process we will catch excellence. I am not remotely interested in just being good.”
Vince Lombardi

Ten Steps

1. You will receive a body. You may like it or hate it, but it’s yours to keep for the entire period.

2. You will learn lessons. You are enrolled in a full-time informal school called, “life.”

3. There are no mistakes, only lessons. Growth is a process of trial, error, and experimentation . The “failed” experiments are as much a part of the process as the experiments that ultimately “work.”

4. Lessons are repeated until they are learned. A lesson will be presented to you in various forms until you have learned it. When you have learned it, you can go on to the next lesson.

5. Learning lessons does not end. There’s no part of life that doesn’t contain its lessons. If you’re alive, that means there are still lessons to be learned.

6. “There” is no better a place than “here.” When your “there” has become a “here”, you will simply obtain another “there” that will again look better than “here.”

7. Other people are merely mirrors of you. You cannot love or hate something about another person unless it reflects to you something you love or hate about yourself.

8. What you make of your life is up to you. You have all the tools and resources you need. What you do with them is up to you. The choice is yours.

9. Your answers lie within you. The answers to life’s questions lie within you. All you need to do is look, listen, and trust.

10. You will forget all this.

The Moment

In the moment nothing is right or wrong,it just is.

Growing Older

The wounds of love gouging my heart.

The suns rays burned into my skin.

The tired eyes of one that has read a thousand books.

The greying hair of years well lived.

The cracking voice of a story teller.

The withered hands of a writer.

The hardened body of an explorer.

The wrinkles on ones face that tell of many adventures:

The crows feet at the corners of the eyes from laughter and tears.

The creases on ones forehead from questioning and pursuing.

The dimples on ones cheeks from smiling and shouting.

A liver that has worked too hard and muscles that have strained.

Bones that may have been broken and feet calloused by many a journey.

Why would we want to die pretty?

Instead,

Die with a story

Etched onto you, for all to Read.

-Romaigne Erwee-

Slaying Dragons

Spent the day in the mountains rock climbing, well at least trying to anyway.

Not so much a problem when the route is simple. But I finally faced that wall…both literally and figuratively.

Climbing a face called The Spear I had to find something inside me that I hadn’t quite had to before. It isn’t like running or kick boxing. It is you and a rock.

The rock is there, it doesn’t move or have an opinion, but it pushes you… Hard!

It’s easy to give up, up there while you are there. It is easy to throw in the towel and say: “I give up.”

But it isn’t so much about getting to the top as it is to spend your moments in anguish. Curse, cry, hang, stare at the wall and wonder where things have gone wrong. You have the choice to do that or look, look deeper into yourself and onto the rock.

You will find purchase in the least likely of places and you will find strength in your muscles to get you up. It’s a discipline.

I didn’t get to the top, I hit a wall and I couldn’t move. I tried, perhaps not hard enough. All I know is that it wasn’t just the physical that kept me from moving.

It’s pretty much a cliche to say I faced my demons but I had to, and I ran away.

Much more than that today I learned that there is nothing more important on a rock, or on a mountain than trust.

All that I went through today wouldn’t have happened if I hadn’t trusted my belayer. And not a little bit like I can trust you to look after my dog kind of trust. This is if you drop me I will be seriously injured and possibly die if you don’t have me.

When you have complete faith and trust in someone on the rocks you can deal with your dragons. You can slay them in your own time and pace. They are there for you…to support you, to guide you and to shut up or mock or tease you. Whatever you need they should mirror.

That’s easy when you take all the bullshit away.

So, your belayer and the rock face both become your mirror.

Its also important to give a new belayer the opportunity to have that trust. Its a learning process. And the satisfaction of having climbed successfully and having belayed someone successfully is perhaps better than the climb itself.

We learn by not only pushing ourselves, but trusting and supporting those that share the experience with you.

You can’t slay a dragon on your own. Whether it be the mountains and rock faces out there. Or the traffic and faulty CD players and even the toll gates you may get stuck at, but the dragons in your mind, the ones that keep you from committing, the ones that keep you in dead end jobs, those dragons will burn you and eat you alive.

So as you continue your journey do not only be concerned with where you are walking but who you are walking with.

And live to slay another day.